Rabbi Mordechai WilligModesty and Restraint

I

"We circled Mount Seir for many days. Hashem said to me enough of your circling this mountain; turn yourselves northward" (Devarim 2:1-3).

The Hebrew word tzafon, north, stems from the root tzafun, hidden. The sun, as we see it, moves from east to west in an arc that inclines to the south. Therefore, the north is somewhat hidden from the sun (Ramban Shemos 26:18).

What follows is the Kli Yakar's understanding of this passage. "Turn yourselves northward" is an exhortation to hide one's wealth. We must hide our wealth from Esav, for no nation is as jealous of Yisrael as is Esav. Esav views all of our possessions as stolen from them, since Yaakov received Esav's beracha by deceiving Yitzchak.

Yaakov questioned his sons, "Why do you make yourselves conspicuous?" (Bereishis 42:1). Rashi explains, "Why do you appear to the sons of Yishmael and Esav as if you are satiated?" They think that Yitzchak stole the prosperity of Yishmael and that Yaakov stole the prosperity of Esav.

Therefore, Hashem commanded Am Yisrael, particularly regarding Esav (who dwelt on Mount Seir, Bereishis 36:8), "turn yourselves northward", so that Esav should not be jealous of them.

This is the opposite of what Yisrael does in these times on the land of their enemies. One who has one hundred presents himself, with fancy clothes and expensive houses, as if he has many thousands. This incites the nations against us, and violates "turn yourselves northward."

This custom pervades a large portion of our people. It is what causes all the hardship that has befallen us. The wise will understand to learn the lesson.

II

The lesson (mussar) of the Kli Yakar has particular relevance as we mourn the destruction of the Beis HaMikdash at the hands of the Romans. Esav is Edom (Bereishis 36:19), the Romans who destroyed the second Beis HaMikdash (Rashi, Eicha 4:21). Our present primary nemesis, Yishmael, is included in the kingdom of Edom (see Metzudas David to Zecharia 6:3).

The Shulchan Aruch (Orach Chaim 560:1) requires that we leave a portion of our homes unfinished as a remembrance of the churban. Ostentation is incompatible with a proper perspective of our exiled status, even as it invites further jealousy on the part of Esav and, particularly, Yishmael, who continue to despise us and/or attempt, sometimes successfully, to harm us.

Conspicuous consumption causes disaster within Am Yisrael as well. It creates jealousy within our people, which often begets hatred, the very cause of our lengthy exile (Yoma 9b). It places pressure on others to keep pace, even if they lack the means, which can lead to poverty or, worse, theft. And it invites an ayin hara, evil eye, as others gaze upon the wealth flaunted by the rich (Bava Basra 2b).

Aside from the interpersonal evils generated by ostentation, arising from the aforementioned responses of non-Jews and Jews, it reflects an inner character flaw. Modesty is an intrinsically desirable trait, and its opposite, flaunting one's wealth, is undesirable even if there is no negative interpersonal consequence.

III

Imagine if the Kli Yakar were alive today! How excessive could the clothes and houses of 17th century have been? The homes, cars, clothes, bar mitzvahs, and weddings of 2010 are, too often, status symbols of newfound prosperity. Eye-catching excess and exhibitionist opulence have, alas, replaced, in many cases, the tasteful and functional lifestyles of the previous generations.

In today's difficult economy, such excess is particularly grievous. With so many people suffering, a wedding invitation which requires three stamps borders on the grotesque. Leveling perfectly functional homes to create ever-increasingly palatial edifices, inexcusable in the best of times, is cruel and inconsiderate in the current downturn which has affected so many.

Again, it must be emphasized that flaunting one's wealth reflects an internal personality flaw, even if there is no interpersonal damage. Indeed, self-glorification is undesirable in all areas of human achievement.

The haftara of Tisha B'av concludes: let the wise man not glorify himself with his wisdom, the strong man with his strength, the rich man with his wealth. Only understanding and knowing Hashem is worthy of glorification.

In an age of increasing anti-Semitism which endangers our people, at a time when we are mindful of the lengthy and painful exile stemming from the destructions of Tisha B'av, we are duty bound to "turn northward", to exhibit appropriate modesty and restraint.

If, as the KliYakar writes, ostentation is the cause of all the hardships that have befallen us, then its avoidance can rid us of these hardships. With appropriate modesty and restraint, the jealousy of Esav and Yishmael will cease, the interpersonal sins within Am Yisrael will end and the Beis Hamikdash will be rebuilt.