Chazal say פנה זיוה פנה הודה פנה הדרה. Chazal make a similar comment in Megillas Rus on the passuk says by Naomi that when she's returning from S'dei Moav that the passuk there also refers even though we've already been told that she's leaving, that she's returning back to Eretz Yisrael from S'dei Moav, vatetzei min hamakom. There too Chazal comment but יציאת צדיק מן המקום פנה זיוה פנה הודה פנה הדרה.
What's remarkable is that in both instances where the Torah seeks to underscore the fact that the tzadik is the ziv, the hod, the hadar of a place, the Torah tells it to us as it were in a negative sense, that when the tzadik leaves, so at that point is פנה זיוה פנה הודה פנה הדרה. Presumably, the Torah could have found an occasion to accentuate instead of vayetzei or vatetzei, vayavo or vatavo, and the lesson could have been בא צדיק בא זיו בא הוד בא הדר. The same lesson as to the impact as to what the presence of a tzadik means could have been framed positively, and yet both times when it's communicated it's framed negatively. So apparently, in addition to establishing the equation between the tzadik and the ziv, the hod, and the hadar, the Torah is commenting on something else. Torah is commenting on a susceptibility that we have to only appreciate, to only notice the fact that the tzadik was the source of the ziv, the hod, and the hadar, the radiance and the glory and the splendor of the city after he, in the case of Naomi, after she leaves. As long as Yaakov was in Beersheva, so it wasn't fully appreciated that he was the ziv, the hod, the hadar. As long as Naomi was in S'dei Moav, it was also underappreciated. And it's for that reason that the Torah tells us the equation between the tzadik and the ziv, the hod, the hadar, dafke in the context of vayetzei or vatetzei because only then is it often recognized. It doesn't have to be this way, but there is a very strong susceptibility that we have that often makes it this way, not to notice, not to appreciate, to take for granted until we no longer have that bracha. The bracha can be the presence of a tzadik, but it can be other brachos as well. I think over the years we've mentioned on more than one occasion the comment of the Gaon with regard to the Gemara in Brachos where the Gemara juxtaposes the two psukim of מצא אשה מצא טוב מוצא אני מר ממות את האשה.
So which is the relevant passuk? So the Gemara says it depends upon who the wife is, who the woman is. But the Gaon says what accounts for the discrepancy between the fact that one passuk is bilshon ovar, one is bilshon hoveh? One's מצא אשה מצא טוב in the past tense, one's מוצא אני מר ממות את האשה in the present tense. So says the Gaon, when it's tov, so then it's in the past tense. A person notices it once and then takes it for granted. It's מצא אשה מצא טוב. It's not an ongoing awareness and appreciation that a person has. And constantly focused on it. It's the same again, that same weakness in and the same susceptibility within the human personality. Again, it's a susceptibility. It's not something that has to be. We don't think in Greek tragedy, so the idea is that there's a flaw that the person can't overcome and is doomed to failure and is doomed to meet his or her tragic end. We obviously don't believe that. We're not talking about some predetermined and unavoidable tragic feature, but we are talking about something for which there is a strong susceptibility. What's the fallout from this, when we do succumb to the vayetze, to the vatetze, or to the motzo syndrome? So the fallout is twofold. First of all, there's a lack of hakaras hatov, and that kshe'leatzmo is a very serious problem. If one is unaware of the ziv of the hod of the hadar, so then one can't have the appropriate hakaras hatov. If one takes the tov for granted, מצא אשה מצא טוב, again, whether it's that literal example or whether it's any other example of bracha in a person's life, so again, a person is not going to have the appropriate hakaras hatov, whether it's bein adam lachaveiro or ultimately bein adam lamakom. But there's another major area of fallout as well. And that's if a person takes bracha for granted, or even worse, doesn't begin to fully appreciate, or even notice at times the bracha, the potential sources of bracha in one's life, one can't begin to take advantage of the opportunities. The Gemara in Rosh Hashanah says in the Yud Gimmel Middos, Hashem Hashem Kel rachum ve'chanun, that the first Shem Hashem, this first יהוה again which expresses Middas harachamim is Hakadosh baruch hu kodem hachet, and the second Hashem is le'achar hachet. So the question is what do you need the Middas harachamim kodem hachet? Le'achar hachet it's clear why we need a Middas harachamim. But what do you need the Middas harachamim kodem hachet? So there are different answers, all true, and what we're about to say is by no means the only true answer, but it's also a true answer. My father zichrono l'vracha used to say that the Hashem kodem hachet was not only she'lo yecheta, not only the rachamim which gives us life, but also Hashem kodem hachet we need rachamim that we should be able to take advantage of opportunities in life. To give one example, when the Rambam writes in Perek Gimmel of Hilchos Talmud Torah at the end about הרוצה לזכות בכתר של תורה, it's clear from the Rambam that if a person doesn't do that, he hasn't been mevatel necessarily the mitzvah of Talmud Torah. The Rambam isn't describing הרוצה שלא לבטל חיובו בתלמוד תורה. It's quite clear that a person can comply with whatever the demands of Talmud Torah are that are presented in Perek Aleph of Hilchos Talmud Torah and still fall short of being zocheh be'keser shel Torah to the best of his ability, to the best of his potential. The Rambam is not telling us that otherwise a person's going to be guilty of bittul Talmud Torah. It's quite clear, but he will have missed a tremendous opportunity in terms of being זוכה בכתר של תורה, in terms of self-realization, self-actualization, which obviously means coming closer to Hakadosh Baruch Hu. Maybe to mention two other examples of how the need to appreciate berachah, again, whether the berachah is in the form of people in our lives, whether the berachah is in the form of opportunities which we're given that we have, mention two other examples. Sefer Ikkarim discusses what the place for hishtadlus and human initiative is in light of the fact of hashgachah. כל מזונותיו של אדם קצובים מראש השנה ועד יום הכיפורים.
All the charitzus in the world, if Hakadosh Baruch Hu has decreed that a person should earn X dollars this coming year, a person's not going to surpass that. He's not going to surpass it. Okay, so then the question is, okay, a person's not going to surpass it, but by the same law of hashgachah, he's not going to fall short of that either. So lean back, kick off one's shoes and, you know, call in sick. Have to find some solution for the midrash ika dedachi, but if we can take care of that. So the Sefer Ikkarim answers very powerfully, it could be that Hakadosh Baruch Hu decreed conditionally. If I earn my parnassah in real estate, so maybe Hakadosh Baruch Hu takeh decided on Rosh Hashanah, decided on Yom Kippur that I should be very matzliach this year, but he made it conditional on my going to the office and putting in a certain amount of hishtadlus and being there when a certain phone call will come in, when a certain lead will develop, that I'll be able to take advantage of it, I'll be able to cash in. So then Hakadosh Baruch Hu's berachah can be made conditional on our being ready to take advantage of opportunities. But perhaps the most powerful example of it all, I think someone comments on this, and I don't remember whom, I think someone comments on this, I'm not sure. In this week's parashah, so Yaakov says to Lavan, הבה את אשתי כי מלאו ימי ואבואה אליה. So Rashi again quoting from Chazal, it seems that Yaakov Avinu is being very, very crude. He says no, what Yaakov Avinu is saying is, I'm already 84 years old, I think is the cheshbon that Chazal make, I'm supposed to be מעמיד י"ב שבטים, so if I don't get married now, when is that going to happen? So what, when is that going to happen? Yaakov Avinu knows beruach hakodesh that he's supposed to be מעמיד י"ב שבטים. So again, there's nothing to worry about. If he doesn't know that, if he thinks that the Ribbono Shel Olam left it open, that it hasn't been decided what his destiny is, so then there's an unbelievable pressure that he must feel to make it happen. But he knows, Yaakov Avinu knows, he knows the immos knew, they all knew, but they all knew beruach hakodesh that Yaakov Avinu was עתיד להעמיד י"ב שבטים. So what's he worried about? What's he telling Lavan? He feels, he feels that time is rachmana litzlan about to pass him by, and הבה את אשתי כי מלאו ימי, because the answer is again that this is a very dramatic and profound illustration of what the Sefer Ikkarim is talking about. Hakadosh Baruch Hu Hakadosh Baruch Hu can prepare a destiny for a person, but a person has to realize that destiny that Hakadosh Baruch Hu prepares for him. Yaakov Avinu knew b'ruach hakodesh that that's the destiny Hakadosh Baruch Hu had prepared for him. But he also understood that sometimes when the hashgacha does that, the hashgacha says it's yours for the taking, that this role is available for you, this role is open for you, but you have to go and now you have to make that happen, you have to realize that destiny, you have to accomplish it. And that's why Yaakov Avinu says I know that Hakadosh Baruch Hu has prepared this for me, but that doesn't mean that I can be very laid back, because I have to make the destiny happen. Right, don't Chazal say that Yosef was also supposed to be maamid and then it didn't happen, and then it didn't happen? So the need, again using the example of יציאת צדיק מן המקום as being emblematic of recognizing sources of bracha, recognizing opportunities, is not only for hakaras hatov, that's also vital, but it's also who knows which opportunity is the one that's pivotal in a person realizing whatever destiny Hakadosh Baruch Hu has prepared for him. We're all familiar with the famous story that the Netziv told how when he was a young boy, he wasn't really applying himself so much and his parents decided that's it, we have to send him out to learn an umnus, nothing's going to become of him, we can't just leave him in Yeshiva, and he pleaded with them that they should give him one more chance and he became whom he became. And he said that if that hadn't happened, when he came up to Shamayim, he would have been shown the Sheiltos and the Ha'amek Davar and the Meromei Sadeh and he would have been told, see, here are the sefarim you were supposed to write. The same idea, a person can have a destiny, but a person still has to realize the destiny. In order to realize the destiny, a person has to appreciate the bracha and opportunity in his life before the pona, not in retrospect, but with foresight, not just with hindsight. So how do we try to avoid, how do we try to overcome again this susceptibility to only appreciate opportunities after they've passed? So one is periodically when Ramchal says that it's crucial to make a cheshbon hanefesh, so the cheshbon hanefesh should be not only about the asham l'achar hachet, not only about mitzvos and issur, but it should be about this as well, to step back and to try to look and take a fresh look at what exists, what's present within our lives. Another reason we sometimes miss opportunities is if we don't strike the right balance between chayei olam and chayei sha'ah. And again there has to be a balance. and attention. But because that's the case, it's easy to lose the right balance. And if we don't have the right balance between Chayei Olam and Chayei Sha'ah, there can be all kinds of opportunities in terms of Chayei Olam that we're either not going to see or that we're not going to find the time to take advantage of. And finally, at least one other cause of missed opportunities to try to be sensitive to. It's important, it's important, especially for young people, to think big. No, not grandiose, not not with megalomania, not unrealistically. Sometimes people do that and that's obviously not what we're talking about. Besides being wrong, it's very unhealthy. But to have aspirations, to have aspirations in terms of Talmud Torah, to have aspirations in terms of Tikkun ha-Middos. Too often we just, we sort of take the results for granted. We think that the options and the possibilities have all been defined and defined in very limited ways. And then, well, I'm not really cut out for Chinuch, so I'm going to be a Baal ha-Bayis. Okay, so that's fine. If that's the case, that's absolutely fine. But it doesn't mean that a person shouldn't have aspirations and, again, not thinking grandiose but thinking big, realistically. Doesn't mean a person shouldn't have aspirations in terms of Yedi'as ha-Torah, in terms of Hafatzas Torah, if appropriate. The mitzvah is Lilmod ul-lamed. So every mitzvah has to be שוה לכל נפש. So apparently that means that even though there are all kinds of considerations that a person has to take into account as to whether or not Hafatzas Torah is for him vocationally, but even if it's not as a vocation, if there's a mitzvah of Ve-limadtem osam, of Lilmod ul-lamed is the same mitzvah, so then apparently we all have a capacity Le-lamed, for Hafatzas Torah, we just have to find the right outlet, we have to find the right venture. So that's just by way of example that sometimes opportunities are missed because we recognize the opportunity, but we don't think that it's something we can do. So a person is not supposed to think overly big, but a person should think big, a person should think, should have She'ifos in Torah, in Middos, in... in t'filla so that he can realize the bracha and enjoy the rachamei shamayim of Hashem kodem hachet.