Yosef Hatzaddik sends a message to Yaakov Avinu: ושבת בארץ גשן והיית קרוב אלי אתה ובניך ובני בניך וצאנך ובקרך וכל אשר לך,
that you should come down and you'll live in Eretz Goshen. Ramban comments: היה יוסף יודע באביו שלא יתרצה לעמוד בארץ מצרים אשר שם הבירה למלכות.
Yosef knew that there was no way Yaakov Avinu would ever consent to live in Mitzrayim, everything associated with such a cosmopolitan city, all the zenus and hefkeirus and everything associated with it, על כן שלח לו מעתה כי בארץ גשן יושיבנו. So therefore Yosef right away at the outset indicated to Yaakov Avinu that he would provide quarters for him in Eretz Goshen. One of the major decisions that a person makes in his life for himself, for his family, is where he lives, the community in which a person settles. And of course a person needs to weigh probably first and foremost the chinuch options that he has for his children in living in a certain community, whatever the radius from that community is for yeshivos, for schools that are within reasonable striking range, a person has to weigh first and foremost what the chinuch possibilities would be for children. But then of course a person also weighs the chevre. Kayedua the Rambam tells us in Hilchos De'os that human nature is susceptible to being influenced by our surroundings, by the people around us. And of course a person has to weigh when considering a certain community, what's the level of gashmius, what's the level of materialism within the community? Is it one that matches what he wants for his family, for himself, or is it perhaps out of balance? Is there the norm, is there a dedication to kviyas ittim? And these are very, very important factors. But there's one factor which kemedumeh is not sufficiently weighed, and that is that when weighing different options as to what community a person will live in, a person has to weigh the factor of commuting time. And here it's important to understand not only that to spend an extra hour, hour and a half, two hours a day to commute for advantages which are not vital. Ich veis, backyards are a nice thing, it's nice to have a big backyard for children to play in. Does it really compensate for the father five days a week commuting an extra hour? hour, hour and a half, two hours. A slightly larger house as opposed to a slightly smaller house can add dimensions of harchavas hadaas to be able to go to the the the most pulsating communities, often mitzad the considerations we mentioned before in terms of chinuch, in terms of chevra, can be very attractive. But that fact keshelatzmo, that this is the pulsating place, does that really compensate for extra commuting time? Now I'll tell you rabosai, everyone, the Ribbono Shel Olam implanted this instinct within us, that's why we all have it. Everyone wants arichas yamim. Everyone wants arichas yamim. If as much as it's within your power to do, you'll spend less time commuting, you'll give yourselves arichas yamim. However many days and years the Ribbono Shel Olam allots, the less of that that's spent admiring the sights on the Cross Bronx Expressway and you know, the inspirational horizons on the New Jersey Turnpike, the more arichas yamim v'shanim a person has, mamash. It's a way of adding not only minutes, not only hours, days, weeks, and cumulatively even more to one's life. So not only isn't the backyard consideration and the slightly larger house or the more pulsating neighborhood keshelatzmo, not only doesn't that compensate for the extra commuting time, and lemaiseh whatever one does to try to salvage that time and people do their best, obviously you can't equate sitting in a beis medrash, which is conducive to learning, to to sitting on the subway and trying to absorb something from a Torah tape that one is listening to. It's a wonderful, wonderful thing that people do their people do their best, but voluntarily to increase that amount of time doesn't seem to be consistent with מי האיש החפץ חיים אוהב ימים which we all are. But the consideration of minimizing as much as possible commuting time, it's not only that that should override material considerations that we mentioned, but it's important to recognize that the shorter commuting time is itself a spiritual factor and in two ways. First of all, the less time one spends commuting, so the more time one has to devote to the chinuch of one's children. Secondly, the less time one spends commuting, the more time one has for learning. And while it's true, and again obviously every... guidelines and and general and and speaking in general categories and and when it comes l'maiseh the decision has to be individualized and and has to be has to be personalized. But it's not it's not at all self-evident that let's say one community let's say objectively maybe is a stronger community. But the other community given where where one's working, one's place of of employment, the other community is closer. And and a person will spend less time commuting and therefore have more time for Talmud Torah. So that's also a spiritual gain. So it's not the case well look at community X is is on a scale of one to ten is a ten. Community B is is an eight, so therefore that automatically justifies the extra commuting, maybe, maybe. But maybe the answer is that in terms of that once I factor in my life as a whole, so even though community A is is a ten on a scale of one to ten, but the tiltulei haderech, the the fatigue, the exhaustion from from commuting and schlepping, the reduced amount of time again not only quantitatively but even qualitatively that one then has for learning, so maybe my overall ruchnius even in the ten community, maybe my overall ruchnius drops to a six. And maybe in the eight community because I have more time to learn and and every minute a person's learning so look in נפש החיים שער ד in terms of what kind of hashpa'ah that's having on a person. So maybe living in in the community which which ranks an eight objectively, but maybe given my personal circumstances maybe that's going to give me a higher a higher level and and a higher a higher value in terms of the ruchnius. Again obviously you know in in actual situations so sometimes both spouses are are working and sometimes the husband himself is maybe is both in chinuch and in rabbanus and so there's an awful lot of details that that can complicate an actual decision. But the point is it should be a major major consideration even even in choosing the job to begin with, even in choosing the job to begin with and to try as much as possible to coordinate and to try as much as possible to to eliminate the need for for that for that commuting. Even again there are always other factors. It's not that this is the only factor, but the need to try to add days and weeks and months and years to our lives by spending the time at home being mechanech, in the Beis Medrash learning, in in one's community being osek b'tzorchei tzibbur and and doing chasodim as opposed to various modes of of transportation is is something which should loom very very large in in everyone's everyone's decision making as to ultimately where where he and and his family settle and work.