The Gemara tells us that the Kadosh Baruch Hu assists the tzadik and that the tzadik is given full schar for his ma'asim tovim. And the Gemara illustrates it by the following chain: that the schar for tzniut which Rochel Imeinu manifested, זכתה ויצא ממנה שאול who also manifested tzniut, and in turn, as a reward for the tzniut which Shaul manifest, זכתה ויצא ממנה אסתר. What was the tzniut which each of the three demonstrated? So when Yakov entrusted Rochel with the simanim, so Rochel didn't tell anyone else that there was such a secret signal had been arranged between herself and Yakov Avinu. She was the only one who knew of it, and basically it was because of that that trust that she maintained which allowed her to then transfer the simanim to Leah. Shaul? So the Gemara quotes a pasuk from Navi that even though Shmuel had already anointed him, but for a little while it was supposed to be kept under wraps, and Shaul didn't disclose the fact. Al devar hamelucha, he didn't disclose that fact to anyone. And the tzniut of Esther is that אין אסתר מגדת עמה ואת מולדתה כי מרדכי צוה עליה אשר לא תגיד.
So clearly the Gemara here intimates that a major theme of Purim is the inyan of tzniut. The expressions of tzniut which the Gemara describes are not really the prototypical or stereotypical manifestations of tzniut that we think of. That Esther didn't tell anyone about the simanim, that Esther Hamalka didn't divulge her nationality, her birthplace, it's not really what we associate with tzniut. That Esther represents tzniut is also indicated from the famous Gemara in Chullin of אסתר מן התורה מנין ואנכי הסתר אסתיר. But what exactly, what element of tzniut is the Gemara depicting? Basically what the Gemara is depicting is an ability to maintain a confidence. That Rochel Imeinu, Shaul Hamelach, Esther Hamalka, each of the three demonstrated an ability to be discreet and to maintain a confidence, not to divulge, not to betray a confidence. Rochel didn't betray Yakov's confidence, Shaul didn't betray Shmuel's confidence, and Esther remained faithful and loyal to Mordechai's directive. So apparently this is integral to the mida of tzniut. The mida of tzniut apparently includes and at its essence that a person doesn't need or doesn't seek public acclaim or approval, so then a person can be discreet in his or her relationship. Rochel had no need, she felt no need to earn public admiration or accolades at the shidduch she had done. There's a sense of lishma. To be able to maintain a confidence means there's a sense of lishma. A person is not interested in impressing. anyone else with what what he knows what what he has what's forthcoming to him. He's not interested. The relationship is lishma. The relationship is lishma. Now when you think of Purim in light of the theme of tzniut, I think it suggests a new perspective on an old thing. That the nes of Purim is a nes nistar. When you think about it from one vantage point, from one perspective, a nes nistar is Hakadosh Baruch Hu kaveyachol acting with a mida of tzniut. It's Hakadosh Baruch Hu teaching us and exemplifying the mida of tzniut. Hakadosh Baruch Hu does it in a way that that his hand is hidden. Hakadosh Baruch Hu does it in a way that he doesn't draw attention to himself. And a nes nistar is Hakadosh Baruch Hu at times so the mida with which Hakadosh Baruch Hu conducts the world, which he governs the world, is the mida of tzniut. So Purim is a story of tzniut from both sides, הן מצד הקדוש ברוך הוא in terms of the nes nistar, הן בקיום של והלכת בדרכיו מצד אסתר in terms of her tzniut as well. Now the insight into tzniut which the Gemara offers and especially the fact that tzniut is a major theme of the nes of Purim and therefore of the, used loosely not not technically, the yom tov of Purim, suggests also a connection between tzniut and between emuna. Purim of course is a yom tov of emuna, of kiyemu vekiblu. And apparently the capacity, the mida of tzniut is linked to a capacity for emuna in two respects. First of all, the focus not on chitzoniyut, focus on pnimiyut, which a person who's tzanua has, is an absolute requirement in terms of emuna. After all, the need for emuna is when on the surface things are not so clear. On the surface, yad Hashem is not immediately overwhelmingly apparent. A person whose orientation is one of tzniut is attuned to the pnimiyut hadvarim and has that capacity of emuna. But it means more than that also. The teva haolam is that a person is is able to appreciate a mida in another person most easily and most fully if he himself possesses that mida. To fully appreciate whether or not the musicians are playing their guitars well, so you have to be a you have to be a shtikel musician yourself. Sounds good to me, but I don't know, maybe it wasn't. No musical ability, no musical knowledge. A person has to be a baal melacha in order to assess and appreciate a fellow tradesman. A person who's an architect walks into a room and notices things about the architecture of the room that the rest of us don't notice. A person who's a tzanua is more likely to be able to notice and appreciate the tzniut of another. Ultimately to have emuna, to maintain and to sustain emuna, a person has to be able to understand and appreciate Hakadosh Baruch Hu's tzniut. A person has to be able to appreciate and understand that Hakadosh Baruch Hu is often hidden. And to the degree that a person understands what it is to hide himself or herself, his own or her own hanhagos, his own or her own accomplishments, maasim tovim, so a person develops that ability to appreciate the tzniut of another, ultimately of Hakadosh Baruch Hu. Moreover, tzniut as the Gemara in Megilla depicts it, a sense of loyalty to maintaining a private relationship. As long as a relationship is private, so then it can thrive and it can flourish. If you have a chavruta, and each chavruta is not concerned with what any third party thinks, not concerned with impressing someone else in the beit midrash, but they're devoted to making this chavruta work as well as possible, so then they can focus all their and concentrate all their energies towards that goal. The very minute I'm interested in someone being impressed, so then right away everything becomes adulterated because I can't focus just on this one goal because everything is compromised by the fact that I'm juggling that with I'm also catering to others. So the more private a relationship is, the more that relationship can thrive, the more that relationship can flourish, and therefore the more sacred the relationship is because it's not compromised by by appealing to any third party. So obviously true in terms of a relationship between husband and wife. It's true in a relationship between parents and children also. Sometimes parents they love their children. They love their children, but the relationship isn't exclusive. They're also interested in people being impressed by, say, at what age their son begins learning Gemara or whatever chochma is appropriate for that age, whatever chochma will be impressive at that age. But the very minute the parent is mindful of social approval and social accolades, so then that lack of tzniut in the relationship which the parent has with the child compromises. It doesn't mean that it doesn't mean that he becomes a terrible parent, but he does become a less than ideal parent because now, beyodea ubelo yodea. the decisions he makes, again, consciously or unconsciously, the decisions he makes for his child, for his children, they're tinged, they're tainted by considerations besides just what's in the best interests of the child, child's development, nurturing the child, the child's chinuch. No, it's tainted, it's tinged. If there's no tzniyus in the relationship of I'm not interested in what impression this makes on other people, I know that right now this is what's best for my child. Does it look impressive? I don't know, more importantly I don't care. That means there's a tzniyus in the relationship, there's a tzniyus in the relationship. What, you mean you're engaged to Yaakov? Yaakov knows that he's trying to marry the daughter of a charlatan and you have no arrangement with him? He doesn't really care? Rachel wasn't looking, Rachel wasn't looking for anyone else's approval, there was a tzniyus in the relationship with Yaakov Avinu. Shaul, there was a tzniyus in that relationship with Shmuel HaNavi, there was no need for anyone else to know. And similarly, Esther maintained that tzniyus in her relationship with Mordechai. That's a tzniyus which we have to maintain, again, maintain in all our relationships. In in in Yiddish when a person is always looking over his shoulder, obviously we're not talking about והייתם נקיים מה' ומישראל, that's when a person is supposed to look over his shoulder. But a person is always always, how does this look? So in Yiddish it's called a ma yomru hagoyim mentality. And and that's the, that's the antithesis of tzniyus. Ma yomru hagoyim if if he goes to such and such a yeshiva. Ma yomru hagoyim if he does such and such, such and such. But is that what what's best for him? Is that best for his development? Is that best for his avodas Hashem? There has to be, it's critical that there has to be a tzniyus in all our relationships. And of course the ultimate relationship, and therefore the overriding need and demand for tzniyus is in our relationship with Hakadosh Baruch Hu. וכל מעשיך יהיו לשם שמים means a person has to be porek the yoke of the cheshbonos harabim of how does it look, what do people think? As long as a person is is motivated by that, so again it compromises, it compromises his relationship with Hakadosh Baruch Hu. And ultimately one way to define emunah is that the only audience to which I cater, the only opinion which I ultimately value is that of Hakadosh Baruch Hu. Now obviously that doesn't mean, doesn't mean if I go to my my my Rebbi, I go to an adam gadol, I go to a tzaddik, I tell him, listen, I don't value your opinion, I only value the Ribbono Shel Olam's opinion. Maybe what he's telling you is he's giving you hadracha, he's giving me hadracha in what the Ribbono Shel Olam's opinion is. So but the the principle is that's the definition of emunah. And again and that's a direct outgrowth of tzniyus in one's relationship with Hakadosh Baruch Hu. Rachel wasn't looking to to impress anyone with what was private in her relationship with with Yaakov Avinu. She didn't she didn't she didn't care, she didn't need anyone else's approval for that relationship. So we don't need anyone else's approval either. Maybe the path I'm going on, maybe it's it's prestigious, maybe it's not prestigious. Maybe maybe maybe if I if I get this position so it's a more of an honorific position, the other's less honorific. All these cheshbonos have to be thrown to the wind. If a person is tzanua and that tznius then defines his relationship with Hakadosh Baruch Hu, it allows for a lishma. That’s why all gedolim, all ba’alei avodah, are tremendously tzanua. We don’t realize part of the tznius, and the Rav Zatzal say that if a person conducts himself with anavah, so if a person walks around like this all the time with the anavah on display, so that’s a little bit self-defeating. If a person is going to be a anava, let him bend the knee, not bend the head. Bend the knee, no one sees it. No one sees that he’s carrying himself with a shiflus. He walks around, he walks around like this, so then when the cameras are, when the cameras are shining, so then he covers anavah. What we don’t realize is gedolim have, are subjects of great fame. You couldn’t, you couldn’t, I don’t know if you could, I don’t know how many Jews you could have found if you would have said the name Rabbi Soloveitchik, how many Jews wouldn’t have recognized that name? So we think that if they enjoyed, enjoyed in quotation marks, such fame, obviously there wasn’t, there wasn’t any room for, how much tznius? We don’t associate it. Not chas v’shalom that we think that they were un-tzanua, but we just don’t see them as examples of tznius. But the emes is that the little bit that the world saw, which was responsible for that fame, was the bechinas almost b’al korcho megaleh tefach and mechaseh elfeh tefach. And it’s true, it’s true for all gedolim, all gedolim. The story at hand, well before I come to that, when the Rav’s father died, it was during the at the end of the Depression. It was during the Second World War at the end of the Depression. So during those years, the Yeshiva as just about everyone, suffered from lack of funds and they were behind on paying salaries. So when Rabbi Soloveitchik, the Yeshiva owed him back pay. So they continued to pay his almanah, the Rav’s mother, gradually to pay off what they owed her husband from the back pay. And then, when as that, as they were able to whittle that down and eliminate that, so then they were going to be finished. So the Rav went unknown to, the only one who knew about it was his wife because she saw what the balance in the bank was and because of that she found out about it, but no one else knew about it. He went to Dr. Belkin who was then president of YU and said, I’d like you to go tell my mother that because of all the years of her husband’s devoted service, had he lived, he would have been entitled to a pension, so we would like to pay you the pension which we would have given him. And the Rav said, and you’ll take that out of my paycheck, and she should never know about it. She should never know about it, no one else should ever know about it. And kach hava, and she lived the rest of her life being supported that way and she never knew about it. She lived with dignity, b’kavod, and she never knew about it. It wasn’t, it wasn’t that the Rav was being overtaken and would make that possible, not by any stretch of the imagination. And khena v’khena, khena. So this is one thing which leaked out. One thing which leaked out, which again... But not because everything possible was done to prevent it. But it leaked out. It leaked out. This summer I had occasion to ask one of Rav Sholom Zalman's sons a question about the zmanim in Eretz Yisrael. How many minutes after shkia Rav Sholom Zalman thought you had to wait until you could be yotze krias shema of maariv bizmano, be yotze krias shema? So he told me he thinks this is what his father would have said, but then said אבל אתה סייג לדעת. He says because he used to hide everything he did from us and so much that we don't even know, so much that we don't even know. In right so just hagah atzmacha, even in devarim yom yomiyim in terms of what he held about a zman for maariv for himself for his own hanhaga, everything, everything he used to hide. He used to hide and inconspicuously hide, so much so that he has no way of knowing whether his father was hiding something in this area. So it reminded me of when he was describing this, it reminded me of the Gemara in Berachos. The Gemara in Berachos at the beginning of the second perek says that Rebbe during his marathon shiur, so at one point during the shiur would be מעביר ידיו על פניו and would stop and say פסוק ראשון של שמע. And then the Gemara has a machlokes whether or not chozer vegomer or eino chozer vegomer. Did he say the rest of shema later? That's a machlokes tannaim about what Rebbe did. And who are the baalei plugta? One of the baalei plugta is Rebbe's son. So Rebbe's son wasn't able to say eidus. He was not able to say eidus about whether his father was chozer vegomer or not. So כך היא דרכן של צדיקים וגדולי ובעלי עבודה. There's no need, Rachel Imenu had no need that anyone should know how much Yaakov cherished their relationship that he didn't want, he wasn't taking any chances with Lavan harasha. She didn't need to tell that to anyone else. So in one's relationship with Hakadosh Baruch Hu, so we have no need that anyone knows whatever we try to do in our avodas Hashem. It's an avoda, it's an avoda that we all have to try, again a little bit to get some musag what it means and to try to work on. I don't know, I don't have such a sense for what other cultures were like in different historical epochs, but certainly the time and place in which we live is one which doesn't understand tznius. Everything, everything in Western society is so ostentatious. People crave fame. One of the ways to measure whether or not a person has made it, quote unquote, is whether or not a person enjoys fame. Just the antithesis of tznius. And when it comes to the mida of tznius, what's true of midos in general is true here as well. And that is that there's a certain cycle. On the one hand, if a person has a certain mida, it causes him to act in a certain way. If a person has a mida of rachmanus, so as a result he'll act with rachmanus. But it's also true in the other direction. Even if a person hasn't developed the mida of rachmanus, but he understands that there's a need for it and he sort of, it doesn't come naturally, but he forces himself to act with rachmanus, so then that will help him inculcate and cultivate the mida of rachmanus. And that's true for all midos. On the one hand, our behavior will flow from the mida, but on the other hand, the second half of the equation is the one which... highlight on the other hand the actions help us develop and cultivate that middah. Same is true of tznius also. Even, even lacking tznius, even if a person doesn't have that that natural tznius which which many even who don't have that natural tznius which which Baalei Teshuva have. But if a person tells himself, again, it it doesn't come naturally, it doesn't come naturally, but I have to tell myself, I have to do it very consciously, very consciously. It's it's not so much a natural action or or reaction on my part, but I have to tell myself, listen, you're not playing to any audience. It doesn't make a difference what anyone else thinks. Do, do what you think Hakadosh Baruch Hu wants you to do, without cheshbonos of will it impress, won't it impress? Maybe I'll look like a fool? Maybe this, maybe that? Just think, think again, if you're if you're if you're if you think you're shakeling because people are looking, so stop shakeling. If you think you're standing still because people are looking, so start shakeling. Try to do, just, just to block out that. Again, the only, the only audience, Rachel wasn't interested in anyone other than Yaakov knowing how much she cherished that relationship, that that she wanted to make sure that Lavan couldn't cheat him. She had no need to let anyone else in on it. And because of that it was so sacred. Because it was so private, it was so sacred. It wasn't compromised by by looking for other people. If a person tells himself that, so then אחרי הפעולות נמשכים הלבבות as the Chinuch says. So then through that that constant again, conscious effort to be tzanua. Again, tzanua in the sense of if I can do this without anyone noticing. If there's two ways for me to do something, I can do it without anyone noticing, so let me do it without anyone noticing. If there's a less ostentatious way, a less conspicuous way, so let me do it that way. If a person trains himself to do it that way, so then it sensitizes him, and then he he internalizes the middah of tznius which basically means that he internalizes this sense of feeling that deep and intimate connection to Hakadosh Baruch Hu and that's what concerns him. So halevai as as we prepare for Purim and the avodah of Purim, Hakadosh Baruch Hu should help us with our avodas Hashem in general and in particular in this middah of tznius and the emunah which it fosters.